Gnomes

Well it's Sunday night and I thought I'd write about the illusive and often annoying creatures that have, from time to time, plagued me with their persistent presence. Granted I have never seen one with my own eyes but I have certainly suffered from their exploits.



According to Dictionary.com:
Gnome
–noun
1. (in folklore) one of a species of diminutive beings, usually described as shriveled little old men, that inhabit the interior of the earth and act as guardians of its treasures; troll.

I don't know about this guarding treasure business and I'm not writing about the popular and heroic David the Gnome. I am talking about the gnomes that cause things to mysteriously disappear. Let me run down a list of the gnomes that I personally have had problems with.

Dryer Gnomes-Somewhere in between the time when I put my socks into the washer and take them out of the dryer these gnomes come along and steal one sock. Only one mind you. I can't imagine what they're doing with them. Making little gnome sleeping bags or something? You'd think they would take them both to save a trip but no, they usually only take one and I am left with the remaining mismatched sock.

Drop and Run Gnomes-These are the gnomes that inevitably run by as I drop something precious to the ground. In a blink of an eye they grab whatever is falling and run away so that I am unable to find it when I look for it. I have lost numerous rings this way. I specifically remember a time when I was on a beach and this happened and another time when I was on a bus. I dropped the rings and could not for the life of me find them. Drop and run gnomes.

Moving Gnomes-Now these gnomes can be a bit more forgiving. Sometimes during the moving process they don't take your things, only borrow them. And months and months later they return whatever they took, while you are left to wonder where the object has been all this time. However, these gnomes do often take what they want too. There's so much craziness in a move that they are running around behind your back grabbing stuff from boxes or bags and stealing off with them. That is why people lose things when they move.

And last...

The Late Gnomes-Close cousins to the moving gnomes, these gnomes don't normally take things for good but they do like to move stuff around and cause you to be late. They like to mess with your head because they think it's funny. They move your keys or cell phone when you're trying to leave the house so that you waste time looking for them. Turned off alarm clocks can be contributed to these gnomes. And they'll also move money into and out of random places so that when it comes time to pay for something you are searching around for that twenty you were sure you had in your wallet only the day before. It's pretty annoying but true happiness is finding something you thought you lost. (If you find it at all.)

I imagine these little beings wreck all sorts of other havoc but these are the few specific classifications of gnomes I know about. So my advice is keep an eye out. They are sneaky little buggers and are always at work to make life a little more complicated.

Rene's Recommendation: Marzipan Fruit

Oh marzipan...you are my sweet little joy. With you whimsical fruity shapes and your shamelessly delicious almondy goodness. If you like almond flavor, then you must at some point in your life eat marzipan fruit. Basically it is confection made of sugar and almond meal. Now it's hard to come up with an idea better then that, I tell you what! The only convenient place I've found them is at Whole Foods under the glass counter where you can also find the fancy truffles, caramel apples and chocolate bark, among other goodies. I believe I happened upon the marzipan fruits by accident, not really sure I'd like them. Oh happy accident! You have not lived till you've tried marzipan fruit.